Carry Your Cross

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Stop the Porn Struggle: 5 Practical Tips to Break the Habit

#1- Keep Your Cell Phone or/and Computer Physically Out of Reach

            The best way to guarantee you won’t shoot yourself is to not carry a firearm. Obviously, a cell phone is not a gun. Nevertheless, the phone is just as dangerous. A gun can kill the body, but the cell phone can kill the soul. Don’t underestimate the cell phone’s ability to kill. It is Christ Himself who says, “do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul; rather, be afraid of the one who can destroy both soul and body in Gehenna” (Matthew 10:28). Know yourself. When are the times you fall? During those times, keep those devices physically out of reach. 

#2-Pray for the Strength to Quit

            Porn enslaves us by feeding off our fleshly desires. All slaves are freed by a liberator. This is true historically. It’s also true spiritually. You can’t quit on your own. You need to be freed by one with the appropriate authority. Only divine grace has this authority. Without God’s grace, you’ll never be able to quit pornography. So, pray to Him for purity.

            The act of ending of slavery is filled with justice, but usually isn’t pretty. Remember the civil war? How about the Holocaust? It was through violent war that freedom was won for the slaves. The enemy must be conquered by force. Just as the Russians stormed the Nazi concentration camps, and the Union armies bulldozed through the southern confederacy, the devil and his conspirators must be crushed. It is the Blessed Virgin Mary, with all the power of heaven granted to her by God, who crushes the head of the serpent with her heel and frees us from the chains of sin. So, don’t just pray any prayer. Pray the Holy Rosary. If you’re doubting, test this declaration by Bishop Hugh Doyle. “No one can live continually in sin and continue to say the Rosary: either they will give up sin or they will give up the Rosary.”

 

#3 Fill Yourself with Holy Images and Music

            What you put in is what you get out. What goes around comes around. You are what you eat. These might be clichés, but they exist for a reason. If you’re constantly filling yourself with worldly music, lustful images, and sinful content, then you shouldn’t be surprised when you behave accordingly. The fact that our bodies, souls, and minds work in this recyclable fashion isn’t a bad thing. Remember, God created us “very good” (Genesis 1:31). We just have to use our nature to our advantage, not our demise. 

            If crap goes in, crap comes out. Likewise, if holiness goes in, then… you can do the math. How do you consume holiness? A good start is the Eucharist at Mass. It would seem there isn’t anything in existence holier than God Himself in the Holy Eucharist. Any of the other 6 heavenly sacraments are life changing in conquering sin as well; especially the sacrament of reconciliation. Other ways would be to change your music. There are popular Christian artists who praise God with a great modern sound. Wear a cross and a medal of your patron saint to remind you of heaven. Do some spiritual reading on a saint for 10 minutes every day. These are just a few holy things you can do to upgrade what you’re consuming. The more you intake holy things, the more your eyes will be opened to the disgust and sinfulness of pornography. When you see your sin more clearly, you begin to be repulsed by those lustful images. It’s a lot easier to stop when you’re repulsed by the thought of it.

  

#4 Identify What is Leading You to Sin and Change it

      This one might seem kind of repetitive, but it’s important enough to have its own category. Human beings are habitual creatures. We get very comfortable with our daily routines. If you’re consistently falling into the sin of pornography, ask yourself, “what are my triggers? And how consistently do I encounter these triggers?” If scrolling through Instagram/social media is an every-day trigger, then don’t do it. If you can’t help yourself, find someone who can help you-like a friend, priest, or other trusted person. A practical tip for a lot of people is to just delete it. Deleting it is tough to do. But it’s the only fool proof way to make sure you don’t scroll through your feed of half-naked women and men. Is television, Netflix, movies, or other videos causing you to fall? If so, don’t watch it. If every night you are lying in bed with your phone next to your head and you view internet porn, then re-read tip #1. Your phone can become deadlier than a firearm. Put the weapon out of reach. Are you a lifeguard on a beach and your job is to watch over people who are in their bathing suits all day? Well, maybe it would be wise to change professions. You get the point. Be solution oriented. Identify the problem and take action. None of these changes are easy. But they are practical and anyone can do it with strength provided by God. 

 

#5 Don’t Fight, Flee

            Saint Paul tells us to “fight the good fight” (1 Timothy 6:12). Fighting can be very noble and heroic. But if you fight a dude ten times and he beats your butt ten times, then maybe you should stop fighting him. Courage and stupidity are two different things. I learned that the hard way. There are other ways to win the war of porn. Sometimes, a more effective tactic than fighting is fleeing. To flee is to humble oneself. One must admit they are not strong enough to win this battle of lust. The devil’s holds are of greater strength than our own. If we struggle with thoughts in our mind, the evil thoughts almost always overcome us. Don’t struggle with those thoughts. Flee them. Think of something else. Begin to pray the rosary. Go on a walk. Take a drive. Go work out. Read a book. Cook a meal. Do anything! Just don’t stay idle. Saint Bonaventure says, “When we are busy at work, one devil may tempt us; however, when we have nothing to do, then an army of devils are knocking at the door of our hearts.” Never forget you’re in a spiritual war zone. Don’t be a sitting duck. 

 

A Word of Encouragement

            You can do this. Don’t believe in yourself. Believe in God. He already conquered your addiction to pornography. He already conquered your sin. Every great journey begins with the first step. Saint Paul, Saint Thomas Aquinas, Saint Rita, Saint Christina, Saint Lucy, and Saint Augustine, pray for this reader and accompany them on their journey to freedom. Amen.